#31 The 6 Signs You’re Skipping Steps in Your Healing

Have you ever felt like you’ve done all the work — therapy, journaling, tapping, protocols, even digging into your past — and yet your symptoms still aren’t shifting?

You’re not alone. What I see over and over is this: people aren’t stuck because they’re not trying hard enough. They’re stuck because, without realizing it, they’ve been skipping steps in their healing.

In this episode, I’m sharing the 6 biggest signs you might be skipping steps — the red flags that explain why all your effort hasn’t paid off yet. By the end, you’ll know how to spot them in your own journey and what becomes possible when you stop skipping and start healing in sequence.

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Have you ever felt like you've done all the work? Therapy, journaling, tapping, protocols, even digging into your past, and yet your symptoms still aren't shifting? You're not alone. What I see over and over is this. People aren't failing because they're not trying hard enough to heal. They're stuck because without realizing it, they've been skipping steps in their healing. And here's the tricky part. Most people don't even realize they're skipping steps until someone points it out. So today I'm going to walk you through the six biggest signs that you might be skipping steps in your healing. These are the red flags that explain why all of your effort hasn't paid off yet. By the end of this episode, you'll be able to spot them in your own journey, understand why they keep you stuck, and see what's actually possible when you stop skipping and start healing in sequence. Let's get into it. Welcome to the Rebellious Healer, where we ditch the fear, decode the symptoms, and take healing into our own hands. I'm Jenny Peterson, a former holistic practitioner, turn symptom-free mind-body rebel. I help women break free from protocols and step into trust, confidence, and full body healing. If you're done with rules, restrictions, and outsourcing your power, you're in the right place. From the outside, it can look like you're doing everything right. You're trying different protocols, working on your emotions, maybe even digging into your past memories. On paper, it feels like you're covering all the basis. But here's the catch. When there's no strategy or sequence behind what you're doing, big pieces of the healing puzzle get missed. And it's those missing pieces that explain why progress feels so slow or inconsistent. This is why so many people get stuck. Not because they aren't working hard, but because the way they're working skips the very steps that would make their efforts stick. So let's talk about the six biggest signs this is happening in your healing. Sign number one, you push outside your comfort zone and symptoms flare. One of the first signs you've skipped steps is when you do something outside your comfort zone and your body responds with symptoms. It never fails. Someone listens to Dr. Joe Dispenza or another teacher who talks about breaking the habit of being yourself and stepping into a new version of who you are. And inspired, decide I'm going to set a boundary with this person, or I'm going to finally speak up. I'm going to take bold action on whatever it is. And then, boom, symptoms hit. And what happens next? They panic. They assume they did something wrong by doing this action that they took. They think that speaking up, setting the boundary, or stepping into that quote unquote new self was a mistake. But here's the truth: the symptoms aren't proof that you messed up. They're a sign that your body is discharging old patterns. They're part of the healing process. The real issue is that no one taught you that symptoms can actually be a good sign. No one gave you the foundation to understand your body's language before you took that leap. So instead of interpreting the symptoms as healing, you interpret them as danger. And that interpretation is what keeps your subconscious locked in threat mode. The problem isn't that you stepped outside your comfort zone. The problem is that you skipped the foundation that would have allowed you to feel safe in that new space. Sign number two, you're only focusing on memory work. Another sign you're skipping steps in your healing is when memory work becomes the main thing you're doing. I see this a lot in certain approaches, like DNM, EMDR, NLP, or even faster EFT, where the teaching is that if you just find the triggering memory and shift it, you'll heal. Or if you just change the memory, everything else will fall into place. And yes, memory work can be powerful, but on its own, it skips two critical steps that make healing sustainable. Number one, most of us are not subconsciously ready to dive straight into memory work. The subconscious has a thousand reasons to resist, because the stories and beliefs from those events have been protecting us. Without preparation, the subconscious will cling to them no matter how much tapping or reframing you do. Number two, even if you do shift in memory, the work isn't over. Memory work changes the perception of what happened. But lasting change comes from what you do afterward. It's the daily repetition, the new actions, and the rewiring of patterns that make the shift stick. So if you're only focusing on memory work, you're skipping the very things that make it effective. That's why so many people end up saying, I did the memory work, I felt some change, but then my symptoms came back. It's not because you failed, it's because memory work without prep and follow-up is incomplete. Skipping those steps convinces people they're broken, when really their brain just never got the sequence it needed. Sign number three. You say, I can't do this work because I can't recognize my patterns. This one I hear all the time. I just can't recognize my patterns. I don't think I can do this work. And let me be clear, that doesn't mean you can't heal. It means you've skipped a step. Awareness isn't something you magically have, it's something you train. It's a skill. And like any skill, it has to be practiced consistently in order to grow. Think about it, think about it like learning a new language. On day one, you don't immediately understand conversations or recognize every word. You start with the basics, repeat them daily, and over time, your brain learns to notice patterns automatically. We are all operating from our patterns every single day. They drive our choices, our habits, and our reactions. But because we're so close to them, we usually can't see them ourselves. Often it takes another person, a coach, or even just the right question to reflect back what's really going on. If you don't know what you're looking for, you don't know what needs to change. Here's an example. I had someone tell me that they didn't think that they had people-pleasing patterns because they weren't always saying yes to everyone. But once they slowed down and tracked their daily decisions, they realized they were constantly putting others first, choosing not to rest when their body needed it, keeping quiet in conversations to avoid conflict, or pushing themselves to keep up with responsibilities when what they really needed was support. That was people pleasing. They just didn't see it until the structure of awareness building made it clear. This is why skipping the awareness building step is such a big deal. If you tried to jump straight into deep subconscious rewiring without training your awareness, it will feel confusing, frustrating, and overwhelming. But once you build awareness through structured daily practices, and sometimes with the help of the right questions or guidance, things will shift. Suddenly patterns you never noticed before become clear. And once they're clear, you can finally change them. Sign number four, you try to tap away or eliminate negative emotions. Here's another big one. Someone tells me I notice these negative emotions, so I tap on them. I meditate them away or I try to get rid of them. And it makes sense why people do this. Nobody likes sitting in anger, sadness, or shame. The instinct is to push it down, distract from it, or try to release it as quickly as possible. But here's the problem. If you're trying to get rid of emotions, it means you've skipped the foundational step of understand what emotions really are. Emotions aren't the problem. They're not something you need to tap away or erase. Emotions are byproducts, signals that reflect how your subconscious is perceiving and experience. In the mind-body world, we're often told that our body is quote-unquote storing emotions, and that if we just release those emotions, the body will heal. But that's not how it works. Your body isn't stockpiling emotions like boxes in a storage closet. What actually is happening is your subconscious is holding on to perceptions, and those perceptions create the emotional responses. Here's an example. Someone told me that every time they felt angry, they would immediately start tapping on it to calm themselves down. And yes, it helped them feel lighter in the moment, but the anger kept coming back again and again. They thought, I must not be tapping enough. I must not be doing something right. The real issue wasn't the anger. The issue was that they hadn't learned to look underneath the anger at the perception their subconscious puts holding and what anger was trying to tell them. This is why trying to get rid of emotions keeps people stuck. It's surface level management. It gives temporary relief, but it doesn't create lasting change. Instead of seeing emotions as the enemy, you start seeing them as information. They stop feeling scary or overwhelming. And instead, they become clues that guide you to the deeper patterns that actually need to be rewired. If you're trying to get rid of emotions, it's a sign you've missed this foundational understanding. And until that's in place, emotions will always feel like a battle you can't win. Sign number five, you believe this one thing will fix everything. And this is so common. You think if I could just figure out this one thing, I'd finally heal. It might sound like if I just knew the subconscious patterns behind my symptom, it would go away. If I just learned this one technique, that would be the answer. If I just tried this one protocol, it would fix everything. And I know this one personally because I lived it. I learned early on that core beliefs were really important to healing. So I threw myself into modalities that promised to quote unquote get rid of those beliefs. I thought, this is it. Once I know this, I'll be healed. But that was so far from the truth. Those modalities were being sold like they were magic. That if you could just clear or release a belief, you'd be free. What they failed to teach was that the real magic wasn't in the modality at all. The magic was in me and in the actions I took that aligned with the new beliefs I wanted to build. That's the missing piece. And here's the truth: your symptoms didn't come from one single thing, and they're not going to resolve from one single thing. Healing requires layers. It requires building safety, shifting perceptions, and then living in alignment with the new identity you want to create. So when you fall into the mindset of one thing will fix it all, what you're really doing is skipping this important sequence. You're treating healing like a magic bullet instead of the layered process it actually is. And that's why it doesn't stick. Sign number six, you're piecing things together or doing multiple protocols at once. One of the clearest signs you're skipping steps is when you're trying to do everything at the same time. It looks like piecing together bits of different methods or following multiple protocols at once. On paper, it feels smart. You're covering all your bases. You're leaving no stone unturned. But underneath, here's what's really happening. Most protocols don't follow a true step-by-step process. They throw you in advanced work or focus only on surface level management. When you stack multiple protocols together, they often contradict each other or pull you in different directions. And because there's no real strategy, your subconscious ends up confused, overwhelmed, and still holding on to the same survival patterns. I see this all the time. People doing a mix of supplements, special diets, therapies, somatic practices, journaling, meditation all at once. And yet, despite doing everything, they're still stuck in the same cycles. The reason? None of those things are connected by a strategy. There's no structure to tell the subconscious, here's the path, here's what comes next. Instead, the subconscious gets a flood of mixed messages and never feels safe enough to let go. This is why doing it all often backfires. You can work harder and harder, but if there's no foundation or sequence behind your efforts, you'll always miss key steps. And those missing steps are exactly what are keeping you stuck. Healing doesn't happen by throwing everything at the wall and hoping something sticks. It happens when you follow a clear, step-by-step process that builds safety. Now, if you've recognized yourself in some of these signs, you might be wondering, why do I do this? Why do I keep skipping steps? The answer is it's how your brain is wired. The subconscious is designed for survival. It doesn't want to sit in discomfort, it wants fast relief. So anytime you're in pain, your brain looks for the quickest escape hatch. That's why you chase the next supplement, the next protocol, the next missing piece. The same survival instinct that drives you to skip ahead is the exact thing that keeps you stuck. Because rushing sends your body the message, we're not safe, we have to fix this right now. And that keeps your nervous system in threat mode, which ultimately blocks healing. This is why foundations are so important. Think about learning to play the piano. The fun part is sitting down and playing a song. But if you never practiced your scales, never built finger strength, never learned to read notes, you're going to get frustrated and quit. Or think about building a house. Decorating is the fun part, right? But if you didn't pour the foundation or frame the walls, all that decorating is pointless. The house won't stand. Healing is no different. The good stuff that's stepping into your 2.0 self, resolving your symptoms, reclaiming your life, only sticks if you've built the structure beneath it. So if you find yourself skipping steps, it doesn't mean you're failing. It means your brain is doing exactly what it's wired to do. Look for quick relief. The rebellious move, the thing that actually creates healing, is to slow down, build the foundations, and move step by step. So what actually shifts when you stop skipping steps and start following a structured process? Well, there's many things that happen. First, your body begins to feel safe. Instead of constantly scanning for danger, your subconscious receives constant signals that it can finally let go of survival mode. Second, your symptoms stop feeling random or terrifying. You understand the language of your body, which means you don't panic when symptoms show up or when you make big changes in your life and wonder why symptoms show up. You know what they mean and how to respond. Third, your awareness grows naturally. Instead of feeling lost or confused about your patterns, you start seeing them clearly. The more you practice in sequence, the more obvious those patterns become and it the and the easier it is to change them. Fourth, you stop wasting time, money, and energy, no more bouncing between protocols or guessing what to do next. Every step builds on the last one. So your effort compounds instead of scattering. And finally, your healing actually sticks. You're not just managing emotions or chasing temporary relief. You're rewiring at the root, layer by layer, which means your body and your mind begin to operate from an entirely new baseline of safety and trust. Your subconscious wants nothing more than to protect you. When you follow a clear step-by-step process that repeatedly signals it's safe to let this go and choose something new, the work you do actually holds. And if you're ready for a space that actually gives you that structure, no skipping, no guesswork, no piecing things together, that's exactly why I created the Heal and Thrive Academy. Inside, you'll get access to step-by-step courses that walk you through the Heal and Thrive framework in the right order and at the right pace. You'll learn how to understand your body's design so you stop fearing your symptoms. Uncover the subconscious patterns, keeping your healing stuck, and retrain your mind and body with daily practices that create lasting change. This is the work that sticks. It's not about chasing the next one thing that's going to do it all. It's about doing the right work in the right order with the right repetition so your subconscious finally feels safe to let go. You can get started in the Heal in Thrive Academy for just $97 a month. The link is in the show notes. So if any of these signs felt familiar today, let that encourage you. It's not proof you can't heal, it's proof of where you can start. And that's the most powerful place to be. Thanks for listening. Talk to you next time.